Relationships … Part One
Today is the first part and the introduction to a series on relationships. Our entire planet as well
as the Universe exists due to relationships. A relationship is the way in which two or more
concepts, objects, or people are connected, or the state of being connected. The entire world is
connected at some level but this series is about people. All living creatures are social and we
are the most social of all living beings. Of course, I could be wrong since we hear nature talking
to itself and assume that it is just making noises.
This essay today is based on my beliefs about human interaction and human behaviours. The
core of my belief originates from my most treasured mantra:“ Every thought that we have, every
feeling that follows, every decision we make, every action we take, and every result we create is
based on what we believe about ourselves.” What we believe about ourselves forms our self-esteem. And through that self-esteem, we live.
Human interactions are challenging, stimulating, inspiring and some people might say
exasperating. We are conceived in love and born in love so it would stand to reason that the
best way we can get along as a species is through love. Unfortunately, we have egos. There are
many definitions of ego but my own idea is that our ego is our shield of protection. What does
our ego need to protect us from?
The answer to that might possibly be, our thoughts that we are
‘not good enough’. And why do we think we are not good enough? When we are born we know
we are perfect, but as we grow and learn, we begin to forget that we were born perfect. How
that has happened is a long story that will be told at a future date. We have become competitive
with and fearful of others, and hence we have separated ourselves in a way that sometimes
causes us grief when interacting in our families and communities.
Getting along is important for people, and Peace on Earth is a universal goal. So how do we
make our relationships work keeping that in mind? We first and foremost figure out how to love
ourselves so that we can have compassion, understanding and accepting of others. What we
don’t have, we cannot give. We are all perfect and intended on this earth and knowing that and
living that is a start to accepting ourselves just the way we are. We look at the world through our
own beliefs. As I mentioned before, we are all perfect.
What we don’t like about others is what we don’t like about ourselves. So I always say, if someone bothers you, irritates you or just makes you angry, then it is time to look
in the mirror. Now that statement alone could make you angry. But it bugs you only because you don’t want to accept any responsibility for behaviour you don’t like.
My take on that is that you would not recognize it and it would not bother you if you did not see it in yourself. We see people running around all the time doing things that
seem crazy or unacceptable to us. We see things that we don’t do and would never do but we usually just shake our heads and move on. What happens when we don’t? Why
do some people press our buttons and some people do not?
Now this is only ‘food for though’ and I don’t have to be right but this is how I see it. And if you
do get angry with me, maybe you need to stop and think about why.
P.S. Because I am an advocate for personal safety, I am not putting abusive behaviour in any
part of this. When people abuse us, we need to not accept.
by Janet Robinson